whats happening with xanga????? another entry today..life is too boring...especially when i am at home..alone i want someone who can be always beside me, physically, i want accompany too easily being irritated everyone thinks that she has sacrificied more than others everyone thinks that she has a reason for everything she does that others HAVE TO understand, that's y we don't like to understand and think about others nothing can be measured too easily am i over-estimating myself? do i deserve 'more'? how 'more" can i get? still thinking about the old days....those-old-days..... i hate ppl who think that they are important, except those i think who are important comparing myself to others alot these days how about 8 years later? then i thought of 8 years earlier, and think about things in between. I confirmed myself....8 years is not easy time to pass old times are better...but not all 'old times', only the past 1 year and 8 months are the best of the best of the best...i can't recall the remaining.... my uterus hurts....i think i am dying i used to love myself alot but now i wonder.. i hate my body i hate my hair i hate my skin i hate my hands i hate my legs i hate my brain i hate everything around me that i can;t control no urge to buy new clothes....i want to sleep i have good friends and my boy ...what else can i blame? have been thinking alot am i asking for too much?? am i asking too much? have been going through alot these 2 months....you can't blame me i want to sleep but i can;t sleep still have 2 more shots of medi to go am i suffering from those 'depression' stuff? i mean...if you finished reading this piece of depressing entry from the start to end without skipping anything in the middle.....tell me, i promise i will love u till the end of the world coz u are really my friend, who want to know what has been happening to me...though i am always typing in english not everyone can understand don't pretend u have, u know what has happened remember, tell me | 
